Tana kara botamochi
(literally, it means "a sweet cake from the shelf (fell into my mouth)".)
Thank you everyone who sent helpful anti-jealousy suggestions. We found one solution (yes, we realize we need many) quite by accident. I was so exhausted from all the newborn childcare and toddler childcare and toddler jealousy that I sent my mom to pick up the Pumpkin Princess from day care and asked her and my dad to bathe her and feed her dinner while they were at it. I caught up on a bit of sleep and brought her home. When she came home, and also the next day, she was happy and not the least bit clingy, and when I told her she must put her wood blocks away before she brought out her Legos, she promptly began tossing the blocks into the bucket. She also cheerfully opened the closet and pulled out a newborn size diaper when asked (she refused and cried and asked to be held the last few times she was asked). Seems the exclusive grandparent attention took the edge off.
It's a work-in-progress, never-ending battle, I know, but at least we have one tool to deal with it.
And I was going to post some upbeat stuff about how much weight the Pumpkin Prince has gained and how much pregnancy weight I have lost and how the Pumpkin Daddy does the dishes when I fall asleep while putting the Pumpkin Princess to sleep, but I found out that my cousin was found dead in her apartment. She was 35. I have been told she died of a brain hemorrhage, but since she was apparently dead when they found her, I am not sure how they know this. She was beautiful and had so many friends. Puts stuff into perspective. A healthy Pumpkin Prince and a helpful Pumpkin Daddy are wonderful blessings. How nicely (or not) I fit in my pre-pregnancy jeans is trivial.